CW: Strong language.

So you thought I’d post one recipe after my two-year hiatus and disappear from the face of the earth again?

WRONG.

This bitch has an instagram now, and therefore is socially obligated to remain consistent for another 365 days so that the people who (shockingly!) decided to follow me are owed at least a modicum of respect in the form of mediocre content.

That said, since this section of the blog only contains general fuckery about inspiration for recipes and life updates (so exciting), let me proceed to waste your time. You can click here or scroll down to get to the actual – ahem – meat of the matter.

Updates: Life’s alright, times are hard, I still have a job, feeling #blessed, feeling #stressed about climate change, feeling #angry at systemic oppression, feeling #helpless in the face of a capitalistic world, made a bullet journal but didn’t know what to journal, saw Indian Matchmaking, parsley tastes like detergent, my oven is broken.

Anyway, this recipe was inspired by Bon Appétit’s Spicy Chicken Katsu Sandwiches (before the whole racism thing mind you), and heavily edited based on my family’s taste buds. Not only is this chicken suuuuper versatile – in that you can put them in sandwiches and burgers, or even make popcorn – but it’s also not deep fried! (It’s a shallow fry, but still)

Here’s what it looks like:

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THE RECIPE

Prep time: 30 minutes
Cooking time: 10 minutes per chicken slice (7 if diced)
Feeds: 4 pieces for 4 people (duh)
Nutrition: Let’s be honest, compared to the rest of my recipes, this is Not The Worst™

INGREDIENTS:

• 4 Chicken Breasts (thighs also work, but cook slower)
  • For sandwiches & burgers: Cut in half and pounded flat using a belan
  • For literally anything else: Diced into bite-sized pieces
• 200 g all purpose flour (or wheat flour)
• Salt
• Red chili powder/paprika
• Black pepper
• Garlic powder (optional)
• 100 ml of any hot sauce
• 100 g mayonnaise
• 1 large egg
• Olive oil / sunflower oil / canola oil – depending on your preference

For burgers:

• Brioche buns (or just any bread slices)
• Butter
• Pickled onions (i.e. onions sliced and soaked in a mixture of vinegar & sugar)
• Shredded lettuce
• Sliced Tomatoes
• Any sliced cheese (I used yellow cheddar)

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Marinate your chicken in salt, pepper, red chili powder and a couple spoons of hot sauce for minimum 30 minutes
2. In the meantime, prepare the rest of your veggies and create a mayonnaise spread (i.e. mix the rest of your hot sauce with the mayonnaise)
3. For breading, combine the flour with more salt, pepper, red chili powder and garlic powder (maybe even dry herbs!)
4. Crack your egg in a large-ish bowl and whisk
5. In another large-ish, deep-ish pan, pour some oil and heat on medium-high or until you see wisps of smoke
6. Remove the chicken from the fridge, bread it with the flour mixture, then egg, then bread again before gently placing it in the pan. If it sizzles, you’re in a good place
7. Carefully move it around after 30 seconds so that the coating does not stick to the pan
8. Cover the pan with a lid and keep the flame on medium at all times to ensure the chicken cooks through, flipping in-between
9. Let it cook for at least 5-6 minutes per side before removing it from the pan and resting it on a wire rack
   • Feel free to add more oil if your pan runs out. Like I said, ensure the bread does not stick to the pan because then what’s the point
10. Repeat for the rest of your chicken pieces
    • If its a large pan, you can add multiple pieces of chicken, just make sure it isn’t too crowded
11. Serve with whatever

For burgers:

1. Add cheese on your chicken, put it back in the pan for a couple of minutes with the lid on (or use the oven! Which I do not have! Again!)
2. Assembly:
   • Bottom Bun —> Mayo spread —> Lettuce —> Tomato —> Chicken + Cheese —> Pickled onions —> Top bun with Mayo spread

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I mean it obviously tastes great – no question there. So if anyone still reading is willing to try this at home, please let me know in the comments (or on my instagram. Which I do have! And will plug here always!).

Next post is cinnamon rolls btw.

Bye 🙂